May 2012
9 posts
2 tags
**You don't openly stroke in front of CHILDREN**
There once was a man, he name was Joe. Joe liked to stroke himself openly. His favorite spot to stroke himself was at the public park where the kids would play in the sandbox. He would encorage the children to roll around in the sand. His hand would quicken, and he would moan to the small 2 year old children touching the sand. He imagined that every particle of sand was his penis, and that is was...
3 tags
Happy Gilmore was happy. Very happy. He was happy because he won the tournament that made him millions of monies and was able to keep his grandma’s house and get the girl. BUT THINGS WEREN’T QUITE RIGHT. Shooter McGaven was a jerk and Happy knew he had to settle the score. He invited Shooter over for dinner to make amends. Of course Shooter was skeptical at first but he thought hey,...
1 tag
…there was a really shitty Vampire The Masquerade RPG where you run around and you’re like rawr I’mma vampire all of a sudden, I remember it was really fucking bad anyway there was an online mode I remember going online and you had to be human and to be a vampire you had to be turned so I walked around the town randomly and found this coven and met some...
4 tags
Moirrey licked his lips as he saw Snap standing there, half naked after exiting the shower, “Are you ready for me to unleash the beast?” Moirrey asked him, Snap with a puzzled look on his face gulped and nodded slowly. Just then Saz crashed through a window and yelled, “Excelsior, devils!” And stabbed them both with the ancient spear of Nordic legend, Gungnir. They exploded...
2 tags
The football team was thirsty. RULL thirsty and they needed some delicious H20. Luckily the Waterboy was there to relinquish all of their thirsts, “MMm I want me summa dat white boy” the one black guy said to the Waterboy, “B-b—b-but you should drink water b-b-bbecause it’s delicious and refresh-” the black guy put a finger on Bobby Boucher’s lips and just...
2 tags
IT WAS A BRISK DAY ON EARTH, PLANET OF HUMANITY AND THERE WERE CARTOONS FUCKING EVERYWHERE. Michael Jordan was running from them with a baseball bat in one hand and a basketball in the other, “WELCOME TO THE SLAM” he exclaimed as he threw a basketball at a zombie Yosemite Sam, blowing his face into oblivion, “IS IT OVER” Michael Jordan asked as he dribbled the bat, or at...
4 tags
IT WAS A BRISK DAY ON CORUSCANT, CAPITAL OF THE SENATE and Mace Windu was plumetting thirty thousand floors to the ground, “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” he kept screaming but in an African American accent and he added the word fuck in there a few times for good measure. Yoda just sighed and was like welp, that sucks. and then this played as...
2 tags
IT WAS A WARM BRISK DAY IN YSLAND and Dogi’s hot muscles were on the fritz again, “ADOL I NEED MORE LOTION AND STAT!” Adol came to him. And then on him. They were great friends, “I GET IT, IT’S LIKE LOTION RIGHT HAHA UR SO FUNNY ADOL” but Adol just stared at him with empty eyes. His eyes were like an abyss you’d only see on a desert planet that’s...
3 tags
Carla exposed her beautiful, ebony breasts and Agatha opened her blouse to reveal two, lop-sided hams that looked like demon’s from the underworld. Agatha squeezed Carla’s gorgeous breasticles, the ebony princess moaned softly as Agatha wheezed, probably due to asthma or some other old person issues, “Ooh, Carla please rub my wet pussy.” She did. But it wasn’t wet. At...
